Sunday, December 20, 2009

The Lawyers Book

Blogsters and blogettes. Suze and me just got back from Barnes and Noble bookstore in downtown Sea View. Actually we were walking 2 the head shop 2 score some rolling papers and had 2 go past the bookstore. Otherwise we wouldnt of been anywhere near that many books at one time.

Reg bagged us again. Maybe if she new we were going 2 the bookstore she would have come along. Ouch. Suze just pinched me with a roach clip. She thinks Ive been 2 hard on Reg. She may b right, but IMHO Reg isnt the same person since she started messing around with her married guy.

Anyway. There was a line all the way down the street from the bookstore with people waiting 2 c the Satin Strangler lawyer Horace Krouch. His new book If She Did Him just came out. Its a story about Destiny Blande the Satin Strangler but he changed her name to Daphne. They say the lawyer in If She Did Him is also a lot better looking than Krouch and he makes the beast with two backs with the Destiny Daphne which would probably never happen in real life so its called fiction.

We snagged Suzes older brother Stan who we call Slash after the Guns N Roses lead guitarist. He was up near the front in the bookstore line waiting 2 meet the lawyer.

Suzes brain got its wires crossed, and she started babbling about Guns N Roses killing off the hair bands which is wasted breath anyway since its totally obvious. I just agreed, hoping 2 skip past whatever she had in mind. No such luck. Be4 I could ask Slash if he had rolling papers and y he was on line at a bookstore and if he ever even red a book Suze got that look that Reg used 2 get when she hung with us.

“Best power ballad of all time” she yelled. I waited 2 c if we were allowed to pick the obvious – Jersey gods Skid Row and god of all gods Bon Jovi. Then she said “I Remember You” and “Never Say Goodbye” didnt count. Just as I expected.

Everyone in line started yelling out songs. Its like they were all power ballad experts or something.

“Is This Love?” by White Snake
“When I C U Smile” by Bad English
“Miles Away” by Winger
“Nobodys Fool” by Cinderella
“Love Song” by Tesla

“Home Sweet Home” by the Crue got some play in the voting. Some New York looking pretty boy kept yelling out “Heaven Isnt So Far Away” but he was finally shut up by a butch biker chick rooting 4 “When the Children Cry” by White Lion.

The top choices became obvious. There was almost a brawl over Poisons “Every Rose Has Its Thorn” and GNRs “Patience.” Slash was chanting “GNR GNR GNR” and pointing 2 himself as though he was the real Slash or Axel Rose or something. The biker chick was yelling at the New York pretty boy Warrant fan sticking her finger in his face.

It looked like a riot was brewing. The chubby bookstore security guard came over and threatened 2 arrest us all if we didnt pipe down. He kept his hands close 2 his hips like he had guns that he was prepared 2 use or something.

Anyway. Being told 2 pipe down reminded Suze of the bowl in her pocket so we looked 4 a place 2 have a few puffs. The bookstore scene was still getting intense when me and Suze left. Having our names in the paper 4 getting busted at a Barnes and Noble of all places would have been a major BK.

We walked over 2 the boardwalk. They started construction there 2 rebuild the amusement park. Lots of bulldozers and cranes all over the place. Suze and me jumped up on2 a bulldozer seat, looked out over a pile of cement slabs, and lit up some fresh Jersey-Grown.

After a few puffs we totally forgot where we were going so we headed home. Were still out of rolling papers, in case u have any and r in the neighborhood.

Thats all I got 4 now. Later.


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